Confront

I look out for you in crowd 

But fear to confront

Fear that one fine day I'll see you standing in front of me,

With another girl,

Happy. But pass me, without even a hi,

While I'll gasp with realisation that it was over a decade ago.

With a thought that I wasn't good enough for you 

Or I was obsessed with idea to be perfect,

And lost you in that process.

I fear the things I've forgotten about us,

That one encounter will bring back those disastrous moments I've not able to let go of 

Will never be able to. 

You've been wondering what is it

That makes me want to stay with burned ashes of feelings we exchanged 

I've not been able to search for the answer in years,

You were right, it's obsession.

Obsession of not believing the devil you turned out to be, 

For finding the inner truth and kindness I fell for,

But she becomes the Lucky one to have it. 

God bless her.

I fear to ask you out,

Cause last time you gifted me a name I still remember,

I don't want another, 

Can't carry the batch of my stupidness on my shoulder anymore. 

The one I already bore 

Are heavy enough on my poor soul. 

Well, let bygones be bygones.

Now that you are living in your fairytale, 

And seem to happy to be a trophy, 

I wish you nothing. Give you nothing, and ask for nothing.

Because it's nothing that will make me forget the mess we've made,

And you ran out.